Healthy relationships and consent

Here you will find information about healthy relationships and consent. We also have information to help if you or someone you know needs support.

CONTENT NOTE: This page has information about sexual consent, healthy relationships, family, domestic and sexual violence.

If you, or someone else, is in immediate danger please contact 000.

To close this page and display another website use the quick exit button. Remember to also clear your internet search history if you need to.

For other immediate but less urgent help visit the 1800RESPECT website.

Healthy relationships

A healthy relationship makes you feel safe and happy. This includes relationships with:

  • romantic partners
  • ex-partners
  • carers or support workers
  • parents, guardians and other family members
  • people you work with or go to school with
  • teachers, coaches and other mentors in your life.

Healthy relationships have:

  • respect
  • trust
  • good communication
  • understanding
  • honesty.

Learn how to build healthy relationships and spot red flags in unhealthy ones on the Health Direct website.

Sexual consent

Sexual consent is a free, voluntary and informed agreement between people to participate in a sexual act. Each person must genuinely feel they want to engage in that sexual act.

Sexual consent relates to all sexual activities, including:

  • touching someone in a sexual way
  • sexual intercourse
  • sharing sexual images
  • online sexual activities.

Consent is a legal requirement. It doesn’t matter if you’re in a relationship or not, there must still be consent.

Find out about the law in your state or territory on the Youth Law Australia website.

There are the 5 core concepts of consent:

Consent is always a free choice. There is no consent if any person involved:

  • experiences violence
  • is forced or pressured to do something
  • feels intimidated or threatened
  • feels humiliated
  • has something taken away
  • is being spied on or tracked
  • is being controlled.

Consent doesn’t come with conditions. It must be free, genuine and without hesitation.

Consent is when everyone:

  • wants to take part in the sexual activity
  • understands what that sexual activity is
  • understands how the sexual activity will happen
  • agrees to each sexual activity.

Partners must talk to each other about the use of condoms and contraception.

Consent is all about communication. Sexual partners need to actively say or do something to check if their partner wants to take part in a sexual activity.

People can communicate consent by:

  • speaking
  • showing without words – for example enthusiastic body language, active participation, pulling closer
  • writing it down – for example in the case of online sexual activity.

People must check if their sexual partner wants to take part in a sexual activity.

Just because a person doesn’t say ‘no’ doesn’t mean they agree. They must communicate that they agree.

If there are any signs of hesitation or uncertainty, like freezing, it means the person does not consent.

Physical arousal also does not mean there is consent.

There aren’t different levels or degrees of consent. There is either consent or no consent.

Consent is an ongoing and shared process. It’s the responsibility of everyone involved to make sure there is consent at all times.

If one person consents but another doesn’t, then there’s no consent. All people must want to take part in the sexual activity.

A person can change their mind at any time.

Everyone involved in a sexual activity needs to be able to consent.

People can’t consent if they are:

  • under the age of consent
  • drunk, high or heavily affected by drugs or alcohol
  • unconscious
  • not awake and alert.

Sexual partners need to actively say or do something to check if their partner is capable and wants to take part in a sexual activity.

Note: the age of consent is different in states and territories. You can find out more on the Youth Law Australia website.

Youth Law Australia website

If you want to learn more about consent, there are lots of great resources available.

The Line is a website for young people aged 14 and older.

There is information about sex, dating and relationships.

You can find more information on The Line website.

You can also follow them on Snapchat, YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook.

Consent Can’t Wait has:

  • information to check your understanding of consent
  • common questions and answers
  • conversation guides.

There are also resources:

Visit Consent Can't Wait to learn more

Teach Us Consent has easy to understand information about:

  • sex
  • consent
  • relationships.

You can follow them on Instagram.

Visit the Teach Us Consent website

Getting help

If you, or someone else, is in immediate danger, call 000.

Remember you are not alone. If you:

  • need help with your relationship
  • need help with abuse or sexual assault
  • are worried about yourself or someone you know

You can access one of these services for support and information:

1800RESPECT is the national domestic, family and sexual violence counselling, information and support service.  

It is a free and confidential service available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to people affected by domestic, family and sexual violence.  

How to contact 1800RESPECT:  

Kids Helpline is a free confidential, 24/7 online and phone counselling service for young people aged 5 to 25.

Call 1800 55 1800

Chat online

If you are at risk of or experiencing sexual violence, you are not alone. There are lots of specialist services available across Australia.

These organisations have:

  • a variety of services including emergency and crisis care
  • counselling, support and information.

Visit the National Association of Services Against Sexual Violence (NASASV) website to find a sexual violence support service near you.

Visit the (NASASV) website

The eSafety Commissioner (eSafety) is Australia’s independent regulator and educator for online safety.

eSafety can investigate image-based abuse. This involves the sharing or threatening to share intimate images or videos without the consent of the person shown.

Find out more at the eSafety Commissioner website